Every Cloud Has A Silver Lining by Wildlightning
Author’s Note: I do not own any part of Without A Trace or its characters. I only own the characters that I created. I also have no medical background or knowledge. So, please don't sue.
Summary: Danny confronts Martin again about his addiction. Will this confrontation end their friendship forever or will it bring Danny and Martin closer than ever?
Martin and Danny sat in the bullpen looking through the phone records of their latest missing person, while the rest of the team was out in the field. Neither man was talking or looking at each other. Danny was still upset at Martin for almost getting that little boy killed and not admitting that he had a problem.
Martin began to sweat and shake. He knew that it was a sign of withdrawal and he couldn’t allow anyone to see him like that–especially not Danny. So, calmly, Martin stood up from the desk–hoping that Danny wouldn’t notice that something was wrong–and went to the bathroom. A wave of nausea hit Martin and he quickened his pace–making it to the bathroom stall just in time as he began vomiting several times. Once the vomiting subsided, he headed over to the bathroom sink. Taking a couple of deep breaths, Martin began to splash water over his face, when he was suddenly startled by Danny as he entered the bathroom.
Danny slowly opened the bathroom door and closed his eyes. He knew that he’d been right about Martin’s addiction. He knew Martin was in withdrawal, and this couldn't wait any longer.
"Are you okay, Martin?" Danny asked, with concern laced into his voice.
"I'm fine." Martin replied too quickly. It was a lie and he knew that Danny saw right through it. He felt like his whole world was falling apart and he wasn't sure how long he could hold up this façade.
"Martin this has to stop. You shouldn't even be here. You need to get yourself into a rehab program. You need to get yourself clean before you get anyone else hurt again or even killed." Danny started.
"I told you that I don't have a problem, all right? I already told you that I wasn't feeling well so drop it! I'm not a freakin' addict like you!" Martin yelled in anger. He tried to stop the words spilling out of his mouth but it was too late. The damage was already done and he knew so from the raw look of anger and hurt that he saw on Danny’s face.
Danny was angry but he had to remind himself that he’d been in the same situation years ago. He’d been confronted with the same accusations and reacted with that same anger that Martin now showed him. That was the withdrawal talking not Martin.
"You need to get help, Martin. If you don't, I'll be forced to report you to Jack. The choice is yours, Martin. I won’t allow you to get anyone else hurt or killed." Danny said harshly.
"Go to hell!" Martin yelled as he started to leave the bathroom but he found Danny grabbing his arm-stopping him-and then Danny spun Martin around to face him. Feeling his temper rising, Martin punched Danny in the face, nearly knocking Danny to the ground. He immediately began to shake and raked a violently shaking hand through his hair. Martin couldn’t believe what he'd just done. "Oh my God, Danny, I'm so sorry! I didn't-" Martin stammered.
Danny touched his mouth and lips, finding them covered in blood. "You can hit me if that's what you want or if that makes you feel better but either way your ass is getting help and you're getting it now!" Danny yelled, his voice thick with anger and concern as he slammed Martin against the bathroom wall to re-enforce his point.
Martin slipped down the wall and collapsed onto the cold bathroom floor. He was vaguely aware of the sobs that racked his shaking body. But he didn't deserve Danny's help or pity–he was turning into monster.
"I'm so sorry," Martin sobbed. He tried to look away as Danny crouched down in front of him. "You were right, it is the painkillers, but I can't stop. I-I threw the bottle in the trash but then I just got the bottle from the trash and took the pills again." He sobbed beside himself as he shook.
"Why didn't you come to me, Martin? I would've been there for you– I would've helped you," Danny said compassionately but shocked at Martin's confession. He hadn't realized that Martin's addiction had gotten that bad.
Martin sniffled, as he tried to compose himself. "I couldn’t bother you, especially, after what you've been through with Rafi and also everything else that's happened-no way. Besides, I figured that you didn't want to talk to me anyway since I almost got you and the kid killed." He let his head fall into his hands and started to sob again.
Danny grabbed Martin's face–forcing Martin to look at him. "Look at me, Martin. You don't annoy me and you're one of my best friends. I'm going to be here for you-whenever you need me. I'm not going anywhere and neither are you. You're going to beat this thing." He reassured Martin.
Martin pushed Danny's hands away; he stared at the floor and continued to gently sob into his chest. "I don't think I can get through this; I don't think I can quit." Martin cried troubled.
"Look at me," Danny said, his voice thick with emotion. "You're going to get through this all right? You made it through that ambush and you're going to make through this." He said with conviction.
"But-" Martin started, his voice filled with emotion.
Danny cut Martin off, but he could feel his emotions begin to get the better of him. "But nothing, Martin. You’re my best friend. I didn't lose you to that ambush and I'm not going to lose you to those damn painkillers." Danny took a deep breath as he felt tears begin to roll down his face, but he had to keep it together for Martin’s sake. "I can help you, Martin, but I can't do it without you. You have to make the choice and you have to start by accepting that you have a problem."
"I-I can't," Martin stuttered. He held his head in his hands as he completely broke down. "I-I can't stop talking the pills. I-I'm addicted to them. Oh, my God. What am I going to do? I'm going to be finished here and it’s exactly what my damn father wants." He covered his face in shame as he continued to break down.
Danny cried as he embraced Martin and gave him the support that he needed so much. They sat on the cold bathroom floor for several minutes as their crying subsided. Danny never once let go of his best friend and Martin held on to him as if Danny were his last lifeline.
"All right," Danny started, still sniffing. "Okay, first thing's first. What did you do with the pills?" He asked very concerned.
"I-I have them in my pocket." Martin sniffled. He reached into his pocket and stared at them– not quite ready to give them to Danny. He watched as Danny motioned to him to hand over the pills. With trembling fingers, he slowly handed them over. He closed his eyes over and looked away as Danny flushed the pills down the toilet–it was too painful to watch.
Danny crouched in front of Martin again. "We have to get you into rehab. Listen," Danny said, lifting Martin's head again. "I'm not saying this is going to be easy, Fitz. You're going to go through hell with withdrawal. Then, you're going to have to go to meetings and maybe even counseling. But, no matter what happens, I'm going to be here for you, Fitzy. But you’ve got to have to want this – alright? I can’t force you to get help and neither can anyone else. You have to decide that for yourself." Danny explained seriously but compassionately.
"How can you still want to help me after everything that's happened?" Martin said sadly.
"Because I've been there and I know exactly what you're going through," Danny said; his voice full of emotion. He pulled Martin into an embrace, as tears streamed down his face. "So stop trying to act like a hard ass and thinking you can handle it all on your own. Nobody makes it on their own, Fitzy–nobody." He said seriously.
Suddenly, the door swung open and an agent wandered in. He looked down to see Danny and Martin sitting on the floor hugging each other.
"Uhh-sorry-I'll-uh come back later," The agent stuttered and quickly fled the bathroom.
Danny and Martin looked at each other and laughed, as they realized how things must look. Danny pulled out of the embrace and stood, bringing Martin up with him.
"I think we better get out of here before the rumors start flying around. Come on," Danny said as he headed towards the door.
"Thanks, Danny. Thanks for everything, man," Martin chuckled, but the tone of his voice changed as he addressed some of his fears. "But-what am I going to do about work? If anyone finds out, I'll be fired for sure. I can't let that happen because it’s exactly what my father wants. H-He would be happy to have me by his side in
"You don't need to thank me, Fitz," Danny said as he pulled Martin into another embrace. "I know what you're going through, remember? And don't worry about work right now. We don't have to say anything to anyone for now, because you're getting help. Right?" Danny watched Martin slowly nod before continuing. "Good, then you can start now. There's a meeting in an hour. If we leave now, we should make it in time." He said with an encouraging smile.
"What about work?" Martin asked nervously.
"We'll just say that you had bad take-out for lunch and that you had to go to the hospital because you’ve been puking your guts out and you think that you're suffering from food poisoning. And me, being the wonderful Danny Taylor, graciously offered to drive you, since you can't possibly drive in your condition." Danny said with a smug smile.
"Yeah, right. You actually think that the team's stupid enough to believe that cheesy story?" Martin said with a smile.
"Trust me, they'll buy it." Danny replied.
"Why's that?" Martin asked confused and uncertain.
"Because you look like shit man." Danny chuckled.
Martin looked at him skeptically and laughed as he realized that he really did look like shit. Laughing, Danny put an arm over Martin's shoulders as they left the bathroom together.
The team bought Danny's cheesy story about the food poisoning, allowing Danny to take Martin to a NA meeting. Usually he would’ve gone to an AA meeting tonight, but Danny knew he had to support Martin–especially now. Whilst sitting in the meeting, Danny looked across at Martin and thought-You're going to be okay, Fitz. You're going to make it through this like you've made it through everything else bad that's happened. And I may not have been there for you after the shooting, but I'm going to be there for you from now on.